I vent, something reminds me of why I write, I get over it.
I have to learn how to handle criticism better. I guess I was never one for compliments either since I never really received them much. Nothing I've ever done was really praised as being fantastic. Probably because nothing I've ever done has been really worthy of any one's time. I mean, except for my kids, I've never really created anything that anyone has liked so much as they do my writing. And with kids? I mean, what did I do other than get my jollies, get pregnant and have a human being? They're cool and all but when it came to making them, it was kinda simple, really.
When it comes to my writing, I'm protective. That means compliments and criticism are taken so much to hear thtat it kinda drives me crazy. If I don't get the reaction that I want (which I'll be honest, it's rare that I don't) I start to kinda freak out a little bit. I want to please people.
I have to remember why I started writing in the first place. It was joke. Yep! Every thing was a joke. Why do I continue to do it? Because I'm invested in a story that's 2 years in the making almost and I want to finish it. It has an ending, damn it! And I'm going to get to it at the end of Freaky Temptation 2. And not only is it an investment that I want to finish... I like writing!!
That being said, I will forever criticize my own work. I will forever doubt myself. I will go on these little tantrums where I want to delete every thing that I've ever written. There have been times that I have done exactly that but thanks to a friend who believed in me, things were saved. I pick up where I left off and I run with it.
Now, I was just saying that I wanted to delete a part of a chapter. Jesus! It wasn't even an entire chapter. And I think that's progress. It didn't come down to me deleteing all four parts, plus the prep for this year's NaNo and including every thing from last year's NaNo. :) Just part of a chapter. And as always- empty threats. Yeah. I'm drama when it comes to myself and holy CRAP when did it become 9:35pm? I guess in that time I took to try to play this damn Star Wars game with my kiddo. LOL :)
Be on the look-out for the snippet :)
2 comments:
congrats on getting over the hurdle. and THANK YOU for not taking everything away. thanks for your time, effort, tears, sweat and anger gettin this stuff typed out. but most of all .... thank you for posting it for us to read. DOUBLE RAINBOW BONUS! it's been said...eh! once again... you rock the whole block! end transmission
How many times do I have to say...."if you'd only believe in yourself half as much as i do...."? You rock! I'm addicted to this story because you have made the characters REAL to me. I personally never want it to end! lol I know it has to have an end and you can't keep going with it forever but Dammit I don't want it to! That being said, just because this story will end doesn't mean you get to stop writing! You are too AMAZING to let that happen,,,the world deserves to read what's in that beautiful mind of yours :)
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